Ain't No Party Like a Dewey Beach Party...

...'CUZ A DEWEY BEACH PARTY DON'T...stop.

You'd think I'm trying to beat up on Dewey with all the coverage they've been getting, but they have just ended up making the news a lot recently. But, I think Dewey Beach is a very good model in our area for a place that is, like many others across the country, facing the brunt of the economic crisis.

You see, Dewey Beach is a curious animal. Back in '81 when the place got its charter, the residents made sure to include a "no property tax" provision in there. That's right, folks. Property owners in Dewey Beach pay no property taxes.

Now, that's a great deal if you own property in Dewey, maybe. Not having a property tax means that the local government must depend upon other, less stable, sources of revenue, including the now-infamous transfer tax (the 3% kickback the government gets whenever you sell your house) as well as things like parking tickets and business license fees (both of which are very dependent upon tourism and, thus, a robust economy). In this economy, all of the sources of revenue that Dewey has come to depend upon (and, let's be honest here, they've made a killing for the last couple of decades) have all but dried up. No multimillion dollar beach houses a selling, and fewer people are vacationing there, so that means fewer speeding and parking tickets.

The result of all this is an economic nightmare. The government has virtually no revenue stream to rely on, so now they have to make some serious decisions about what they can and can't afford to do. Today, the Town announced that they will be raising fees and cutting police and lifeguards in order to make up for a current budget shortfall. The leadership there says that these changes will result in a surplus, which is good news for the people who live in Dewey.

Of, course, what do they care? Nobody can raise their taxes, and they'll have lots of watering holes to choose from when they need to escape from the Great Depression II.

Uproar on the Shore

Dewey beach was one of the last towns in Delaware to receive a charter and become a municipality. Prior to its incorporation in 1981, though, Dewey Beach was probably one of the most distinct places in all of Delaware. Known for its beach-bonanza craziness, seedy bar life, and a live-and-let-live approach to rule enforcement, Dewey and its denizens had a wonderfully unique character and reputation around the state and around the region. When a group of people got together to trek over to Dewey, they knew what they were getting into.

Today, I guess it's a different story. The News Journal published an article here that talks about the increasing anger of Dewey Beach residents over the loud and rowdy nightlife that has always defined Dewey and set it apart from the "Quiet Resorts" of Bethany Beach, South Bethany, and Fenwick Island. Some residents claim that Dewey's restaurants are mainly a front for alcohol sales and that properties end up unrented because they are too close to the noise.

Of course, all this hoopla finds a lot of its roots in an episode of the reality show COPS that was filmed there this past summer and aired in September. The backlash against the portrayal of Dewey Beach as a "Daytona Beach of the Mid-Atlantic" was palpable and many residents expressed their anger about it to their local leaders and the media.

Within all this bad noise and yelling about nuisance and drunkenness, I can't help but see an underlying tone of puritanical rage and major overreaction. And, above it all, you can hear me shouting, "It's the economy, stupids!" The blend of cheap rooms, high availability of alcohol, and many decades of a reputation as a party town is an economic force that no WASPy, upper-middle-class petition-signing is going to make go away. Dewey is what it is. It is not a "Quiet Resort" and the bars and restaurants that are there know this and respond to the people who come to Dewey. Fifty-million Dewey fans can't be wrong...and they all just got another round on the house.

Let me give you a little glimpse into the near future in Dewey Beach. Those Dewey residents who are complaining will ultimately do one of four things: sell their Dewey property and buy a nice, quiet set-up in Bear Trap Dunes; rent their Dewey property to more tolerant young hooligans and buy a nice, quiet set-up in South Bethany; live with it until they ultimately die of stress and worry about all those darn (drunk) kids on their lawn; or, embrace it and open up a big, gaudy tiki bar that will give the Starboard a run for its money.

Don't fight the powerful force of nature that is the local economy. I would think that people who live so close to the beach (a la "don't turn your back on the ocean) would know better.

Giving the Gift of IT

It seems Christmas has come early this year for the Town of Dewey Beach. According to this article, published yesterday, a long-time resident of the Town has offered to maintain the Town's website for the bargain price of $1 a month. For you number wonks, that works out to a paltry 2 cents per week, or one-half of one-hundredth of one cent per hour (assuming a 40-hour workweek). I guess time will tell if this is a bargain or if the old adage "you get what you pay for" holds true. For now, the Town's official website looks pretty good compared to most other small towns' sites.

If only all IT professionals charged a mere $12 bucks a year for their services...until then, I'll deal with my mile-long inbox of spam and and my dozen or so pop-ups per hour the old-fashioned way.

Yes, Dewey, there is a Santa Claus...and he knows Javascript.